its been three years now. by now i'm supposed to know what i am, and what i want
well, i do know what i want. i just can't achieve it
people tell me i just have brainworms or whatever, i think my issues are deeper than that. i had to hide who/what i was since i was in single-digit ages, and now im just supposed to embrace it? well before puberty i knew i was wrong. what i liked was wrong. even then i had so much shame. even now i have so much shame. i feel like all thats left of me is a bundle of jealousy and shame
what are you supposed to do when you know what's best for you, but your own mental blockage and fear prevent you from doing it? i don't know. its why im still here, stuck